2 posts in 1 day.. read post below for 1st one

The following blog is meant to be just me thinking out loud about general stuff. It is not meant to criticize nor advise anybody. While I admit it is inspired by recent events, if any reader feels I’m talking about you, it really is just a coincidence. =)

I was thinking about what it takes to get into a relationship with someone. How does one know if he/she is the right one to go with? Seeing how it’s usually the guy who does the chasing, such a dilemma would more likely fall on the girl than the guy. I seldom hear of guys wondering if they should accept a girl’s advances. (Haha…)

Back to the topic: How does one know if a certain guy is “worthy” enough to be a girl’s boyfriend? What criteria could she use to judge how well he scores in the boyfriend test?

Being a guy, I am understandably clueless about what girls think about when they consider a guy. However, I would like to make a few guesses about what they may be thinking about.

Firstly, I think that girls would need to feel a sense of security with the guy. A sense of security can come in many different forms. It could be a physical sense of security because he is so tall and strong (without looking over built that is). It could also be a financial sense of security in that the guy has a stable income or has bright career prospects. Another sense of security is the emotional kind. Some girls may think a certain guy is suitable because he is always there for her when she needs someone to lean on.

Whatever they make their “sense of security” to be, the bottom line is that girls need to feel they can depend on the guy and feel protected. That doesn’t mean they like to play the damsel in distress. We don’t live in medieval times. But neither would they want to be the one who “wears the pants” in the relationship, the one who supports the guy more than the other way around.

That’s just my guess anyway.

Another thing girls probably consider is whether they can imagine themselves being with the guy. This is purely superficial because this is mainly about the image she sees in her mind. Can she imagine herself kissing that face, hugging him etc? If the answer is no, then it doesn’t really matter how good he is. It just would feel too awkward to be with a guy like him. I am very confident about myself. So I think that the main reason girls couldn’t accept me is this “imagine being with me” consideration. The fact is that I would be shorter than the girl and as I said earlier, it just feels awkward to them. I don’t blame them for thinking that way but it will never stop me from going after a girl I like either. ;) And If I managed to go after her till she wants me despite my height, I think it shows how much I must have liked her to try this hard. Perhaps more importantly, it would show how much she must really like me to see past the awkwardness.

Another important consideration is whether they are compatible. Do they share common interests and take part in common activities? This is important to anybody regardless of gender. It’s strange to call girl A your girlfriend if you don’t really enjoy doing any of the stuff she does. If you don’t spend time together with her, how can you really say you like her? Liking a person despite not spending time with her would make you no different from those crazy fans that say they love their idol singers. And we all know that kind of love doesn’t last.
To be continued…