2 posts in 1 day.. read post below for 1st one

The following blog is meant to be just me thinking out loud about general stuff. It is not meant to criticize nor advise anybody. While I admit it is inspired by recent events, if any reader feels I’m talking about you, it really is just a coincidence. =)

I was thinking about what it takes to get into a relationship with someone. How does one know if he/she is the right one to go with? Seeing how it’s usually the guy who does the chasing, such a dilemma would more likely fall on the girl than the guy. I seldom hear of guys wondering if they should accept a girl’s advances. (Haha…)

Back to the topic: How does one know if a certain guy is “worthy” enough to be a girl’s boyfriend? What criteria could she use to judge how well he scores in the boyfriend test?

Being a guy, I am understandably clueless about what girls think about when they consider a guy. However, I would like to make a few guesses about what they may be thinking about.

Firstly, I think that girls would need to feel a sense of security with the guy. A sense of security can come in many different forms. It could be a physical sense of security because he is so tall and strong (without looking over built that is). It could also be a financial sense of security in that the guy has a stable income or has bright career prospects. Another sense of security is the emotional kind. Some girls may think a certain guy is suitable because he is always there for her when she needs someone to lean on.

Whatever they make their “sense of security” to be, the bottom line is that girls need to feel they can depend on the guy and feel protected. That doesn’t mean they like to play the damsel in distress. We don’t live in medieval times. But neither would they want to be the one who “wears the pants” in the relationship, the one who supports the guy more than the other way around.

That’s just my guess anyway.

Another thing girls probably consider is whether they can imagine themselves being with the guy. This is purely superficial because this is mainly about the image she sees in her mind. Can she imagine herself kissing that face, hugging him etc? If the answer is no, then it doesn’t really matter how good he is. It just would feel too awkward to be with a guy like him. I am very confident about myself. So I think that the main reason girls couldn’t accept me is this “imagine being with me” consideration. The fact is that I would be shorter than the girl and as I said earlier, it just feels awkward to them. I don’t blame them for thinking that way but it will never stop me from going after a girl I like either. ;) And If I managed to go after her till she wants me despite my height, I think it shows how much I must have liked her to try this hard. Perhaps more importantly, it would show how much she must really like me to see past the awkwardness.

Another important consideration is whether they are compatible. Do they share common interests and take part in common activities? This is important to anybody regardless of gender. It’s strange to call girl A your girlfriend if you don’t really enjoy doing any of the stuff she does. If you don’t spend time together with her, how can you really say you like her? Liking a person despite not spending time with her would make you no different from those crazy fans that say they love their idol singers. And we all know that kind of love doesn’t last.
To be continued…

this thought just occured to me

Life is full of double standards, but none more prevalent than in the way men and women treat each other.

If 3 men ask the same woman out on a date, she can agree to go out with all 3 men at a time. After all, any woman has the right to know each man better before deciding which men is the right one for her. And so the 3 men, despite knowing they are not the only person chasing after her, still happily agree to this multi-date concept. They do not feel insulted they are “just another date” but, in fact, feel happy they are on a level playing field with the other rivals in love.

But if we turn the tables around and I give a scenario where a man asks 3 different women out on a date, I’m positive every woman would feel disgusted. No woman would like it. The man is obviously some insincere playboy who only treats women as objects; toys to play with. The idea that the man is simply trying to know each woman better before deciding which woman is right for him is simply unheard of. Why do women think it’s ok to go out with 3 different men yet not be willing to accept 1 man dating 3 different woman?

Another double standard is the idea of being “gentlemanly”. If a woman is having trouble opening the door, I should leap to help her. That’s the gentlemanly thing to do. On the other hand, if we reverse the situation and it is a man having trouble opening the door, a woman can’t help the man open the door. That would be hurt his male ego. Why do men think it’s perfectly right to help women, yet feel hurt or even insulted when women help them in the exact same scenario?

Well, at least there’s one thing that is similar across both genders. And that is: both genders are just so hard to understand. =)

shh.. i'm blogging..

Well, I seem to have some time to myself now. All my supervisors are away for unknown reasons so I can’t ask for any jobs. This would make now a good time to blog a little, especially since my medium boss is back.

??? What is a “medium boss”? Well, you see… the command structure here is a little complex. Within one level of hierarchy exists many sub levels. The lowest level is of course my immediate supervisor. This is followed by his supervisor whom I call my “small boss”. This small boss has her own supervisor who is my “medium boss”. They all report to one guy everyone calls the “big boss”.

Of course, that big boss reports to a bigger boss but I only see him occasionally. So, as far as I am concerned, he is not really my boss although he is probably the one who approved my salary.

Anyway, my medium boss doesn’t want to catch anyone sleeping or surfing the net. So the only thing I can think of that would avoid the above 2 situations is blogging. As you know, I blog on a word document first before I copy it over to the net. So hopefully it is not obvious.

The only problem with blogging in this way is that I am terrified of saving the document in this computer so I have to finish writing everything in the word document before someone gives me a job or I am forced to be away from my computer. My password is common to quite a few people. So anyone could see my word document if they chose to open my account. If I could blog directly, I wouldn’t have that problem since I could always delete the Internet history.

I have this gut feeling I am about to receive an arrow. I can almost feel that someone is already taking aim at me and ready to shoot. So I better blog faster…

Well, work now consists of performing the exact same tasks thing on the exact same things at the exact same time. What can I say? That’s what experiments are all about. It’s just that it gets really, really mind-numbing when I have to perform the same experiment for 30days.

I wasn’t supposed to do this job. It was originally tasked to my friend. However, the poor guy is firing bullets and jumping over mud-pools for his reservist training. So poor old weixian here has to make sure the experiment fulfils its 30-day continuity criterion.

I now understand why my friend looked like he was on the verge of insanity after he finished the 1st week’s lab work. The lab has nothing but this rotten egg smell because of all the chemicals mixing together. There is no radio to listen to so it is very hard to keep oneself entertained while doing the lab work. In fact, I’ve even resorted to some singing to keep my brain from turning into stone. I hope the people who occasionally enter the lab aren’t deaf by now.

The only consolation is that I get to see my eye candy everyday for at least 3 times a day (which is kind of like taking medicine for my sanity). She has to work at the lab too though in a different room. However, she often to has make trips to and fro so every time she does I get to sneak a peek at her taut, slim waist (which she proudly flaunts) and those nice shoulders. Although I still think she’s only average in terms of facial features, she does have a really nice smile (though for some reason I do not think of her as being a Samantha… I don’t know why…)

Most importantly, she smiles AT ME and talks to me when she’s free. So it’s always a great way to feel alive again when someone shows some concern for you and acknowledges your existence. Her acknowledgement is all the more precious when the other girls seem to treat me like some germ: they know I must exist but they pretend I don’t. Up till now, they have yet to say hi or anything.

Oh wait. One of them did say “hi, can you take care of this camera for me? Thanks” but that doesn’t really count does it? Haha

At least the guys here are nicer. One guy always calls me “lao da” even though he looks twice my size (both width and height). To be honest, I don’t get along with him because he speaks in Chinese. Or rather, he speaks Chinese so quickly I have no clue what he is saying. His way of talking to me is to first make sure he gets my attention by speaking clearly then start spraying one whole barrage of words at me. So, to me, it goes something like “ Lao Da, bu jie yi wo %*&#@#()$)^**)#%(_^… ke yi ma?”

I always assume he is not asking me to do anything funny so I just say “orh”. And so far, he has not approached me for money or sexual favours so I guess it really was innocent after all. =P

Anyway, the weekend is drawing near. Today, my sister is coming back from Australia for a short reunion. I’m surprised she came back even though she knew I would be busy working. But I’m sure my parents can entertain her. However, I suspect this means I cannot go out on weekends anymore till she flies back. After all, I already wouldn’t see her much on weekdays. I also think this means I should be gaining weight. I usually have a full lunch and a light dinner. However, now that dinnertime is the only time the whole family can eat together, I suspect we will be going to restaurants/hawker centers for dinner quite often. I do not like to sleep on a full stomach but I guess I don’t have much choice.

Come to think of it, if my sister does decide to stay in Singapore rather than be a PR in Australia, it’s going to take some time for me to re adjust to sharing my home with a sibling again. It’s been about 4 years since she went and I’m now so used to having the bathroom, the tv and other things all to myself. Most notably is the time. With my sister around, I would spend time with her, which means less time for myself. I won’t play so much DOTA and stuff. Also, she may want to watch those channel 8 dramas with me while I would prefer to watch channel 5. (She’s just as ang moh pai as me but she likes the melodrama and she reads the subtitles.)
So these next few weeks would be good training in the event I have to readjust next time.
Ok bye.

finally..

Finally, I have some time to blog. For the past few days, I have either been too busy to blog or I don’t have access to a computer. Life in the office is becoming less and less interesting. Today is one of those days where my friend and I have to find ways to keep ourselves busy without being scolded.

It’s not that I don’t have things to do actually. I am supposed to measure quite a few things. Unfortunately, there is only 1 measuring machine I can use. There used to be 2 but some student from long ago damaged it so now everybody is queuing up to use this 1 machine. It’s one of those situations where the queue is long enough to cause disruptions but not long enough to justify buying a 2nd machine. So I’ll just have to wait.

Not that I mind too much today. After all, I finally get to use the computer and I’ve wanted to say a number of things.

The first thing I wanted to announce is that I went on a shopping spree! Shopping is no longer an activity confined to girls, just as how soccer is no longer purely a guys’ domain. I am not ashamed or embarrassed to admit that I thoroughly enjoyed my minor shopping spree. I am not sure if there is a minimum amount of money girls must spend during a shopping trip before they consider it to be a genuine shopping spree. However, for a guy like me who has never bought anything that costs more than 100 except maybe once a year, I spent a hefty sum that day. I bought myself a pair of Levi’s. this is amazing because I never felt I was rich enough to afford a pair. And when there is a sale, they usually don’t have my size. Well, that day I kind of reached a compromise with Levi’s. They gave me a pair of jeans that fits and I gave them $30 more than I would have preferred to spend. The pair I bought was not on sale but it was their “cheaper” version. 508. I couldn’t care less if it was 555. The main thing is the jeans look great and the money, though a bit much, is worth it.

While waiting for my jeans to be altered, I passed by this shop for youngsters. It’s something like 77th street only not so “ah-beng, ah-lian”. It sells this line of fashion called “rusty”. The shop assistant told me it’s “specially imported”. To me, that just means it is probably made in China. Nonetheless, I really thought this brand and I shared the same fashion sense so I bought a leather sling bag and wallet. My old wallet, if you can recall, looked like a lady’s purse: small and cubic. It was a present from some church gals so maybe they forgot how a men’s wallet looks like. Anyway, since I was already in a spending mood, I decided now was the only day I could buy a new wallet without considering that my old wallet is still working fine.

Oh and before I shopped at Levi’s, I happened to buy a billabong t-shirt too.

So as you can see, I spent quite a bit that day. But I enjoyed the whole shopping spree experience. Carrying a lot of shopping bags and looking like you spent a lot is fun. Besides, I only do it once a year and I may be selling my xbox soon to recover some money. Because of my industrial attachment, my poor console has just been collecting dust these past weeks. It makes me wonder if I really need an xbox once I start working. Actually, the real reason I’m neglecting my xbox is because I have DOTA now. DOTA just seems to be a game more suited for post-office relaxation. I can chat with my friends while playing and it’s always more fun when you are challenging other fellow humans rather than a non-responsive, predictable A.I. While I do miss the excitement of spraying bullets through 99 aliens at one go, this cheap thrill would die almost as quickly as it started. I give myself only 15 minutes of playtime before I feel bored of the shooting again.

However, if I make a lot of money in the future, I will probably invest in a ps3. It costs almost 1000 but I can play online for free, the quality of the console is unsurpassed and the games are still v good. I heard that some game creators are defecting to xbox but I doubt the overall game variety will change much.

Before that, I would need to buy a High Definition TV to suit the ps3. This would set me back another 1000. So basically, I will not own a ps3 till I’m 30. (By then, ps10 would have come out.)